RIP Mitch Hedberg

[bste_lax]

Damn, probably one of the funniest comedians of recent times died. Some are hoping it is some rumor/April Fool's Joke but here is a story from a newspaper in Minnesota where he is from:

Comedian Mitch Hedberg dead at 37

BY MATT PEIKEN

Pioneer Press

Even family and close friends had a hard time understanding Mitch Hedberg, a St. Paul native who ran away from home and, despite living a scattershot life, became a runaway success as a standup comic.

Hedberg, whose space-case persona was as much part of his soul as it was his act, died early Wednesday morning in a New Jersey hotel room. He was 37. A medical examiner hasn't issued findings, but Hedberg's family is told he suffered a heart attack. His wife was with him.

The whole article can be found here: http://www.twincities.com/mld/twincities/11278099.htm


For anyone who doesn't know who he is, I highly reccommend picking up his Comedy Central CD/DVD....some of the funniest comedy I have seen in a long time. He has a very dry and weird style.

"Alcoholism, is a disease, but it's the only disease that you can get yelled at for having. Dammit Otto, your an alcoholic. Dammit Otto, you have Lupis. One of those two doesn't sound right."

"An escalator can never break. It can only become stairs. You would never seen an Escalator temporarily out of order sign, just Escaloaor temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience."

[Danny Hogan]

'bannanas are the exact opposite of stoplights yellow means go, green means stop, red means Where the hell did you get that bananna?'


although i'm not convinced its not an april fools joke. it hasn't been reported by any major news sources on the web and people have just been assuming he oD'ed. this morning on stern they were going to play a tribute to him but ended up not doing it. i think its because howard was let in on the hoax.

[bste_lax]

Danny, more and more stuff is starting to leak out on it. I saw one thing on the usatoday website and something on another "credible" news source. I am just hoping I am a moron who fell for an April's Fools Joke as I find him very funny and he hope he lives to see another day.

[Danny Hogan]

me too i've seen him live a couple times and it would suck if he was dead. although it was no secret that he messes around with the H.

[ZagGrad]

Does this guy have long hair (shoulder length) and wear glasses? If it is, I saw him on Lettermen. One of his jokes was "Someone asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I did not want a frozen banana, but I wanted one later, so I told them yes."

[bste_lax]

[bste_lax]

'I tried walking into a Target , but I missed."

"I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long."

"I type 101 words a minute. But it's in my own language."

"I wish I could play little league now. I'd be way better than before."

"I would imagine if you understood Morse Code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy."

"It's hard to dance if you just lost your wallet. Whoa! Where's my wallet? But, hey this song is funky."

"I played golf....I did not get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy and that's way more satisfying. Your supposed to yell FORE, but I was too busy mumbling that ain't no way that's gonna hit him."

"I wrote a letter to my dad- I wrote, I really enjoy being here. But I accidently wrote rarely, instead of really. But I still wanted to use it, so I crossed it out and wrote I rarely drive steamboats, Dad. There's a lot you don't know about me. Quit trying to act like I'm a steamboat operator. This letter took a harsh turn right away."

"And then at the end of the letter i like to write P.S.- This is what part of the alphabet would look like if Q and R were eliminated."

"The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how much I play, I'll never be as good a a wall. I played a wall once. They're relentless."

"When someone hands you a flier, it's like they're saying here you throw this away."

"I like rice. Rice is great if your hungry and want 2000 of something."

"I got my hair highlighted, because I felt some strands were more important that others."

"I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it."

"I hate turkeys. If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad a turkeys. There's turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastromi,.Some one needs to tell the turkey, man, just be yourself."

"I lke refried beans. I wanna try fried beans, because maybe they're just as good and we're just wasting time."

"I got into and argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That's a bad place for an argument, because I tried to walk out and slam the flap. How are you supposed to express your anger in this situation? Zipper it up real quick?"

"This product that was on TV was available for four easy payments of $19.95. I would like a product that was available for three easy payments and one complicated payment. We can't tell you which payment it is, but one of these payments is going to be hard."

"I was going to get my teeth whitened, but I said screw that, I'll just get a tan instead."

"I was at this casino minding my own business and this guy came up to me and said your gonna have to move you're blocking a fire exit. As if there were a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you are flamable and have legs you are never blocking a fire exit."

"I don't own a cell phone or a pager. I just hang around everyone I know, all the time. If someone wants to get a hold of me they just say "Mitch," and I say "What?" and turn my head slightly."

"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later."

"My friend said to me "You know what I like? Mashed poatoes," I was like, Dude, you gotta give me time to guess. If your ging to quiz me, you must put a pause in there."

"An escalator can never break. It can only become stairs. You would never seen an Escalator temporarily out of order sign, just Escaloaor temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience."

"I was walking down the street with my friend and he said "I hear music" As though there's another way you can take it in. Your not special. That's how I recieve it too. I tried to taste it, but it did not work."

"I went to the park and saw a kid flying a kite. The kid was really excited. I don't know why, that's what they're supposed to do. Now if he had a chair on the other end of that string, I would have been impressed."

"I was at the airport and this guy came up to be and said I saw you on tv last night. He didn't say if I was any good. He just told me where I was. So turned away for a minute and said Hey I saw you at the airport a minute ago. You were good."

I can't get into flossing, I can't. People who smoke say you don't know how hard it is to stop smoking. Yes I do. It's as hard as it is to start flossing. You seem jittery. Yeah, I'm about to floss.

"One time a guy handed me a picture of himself and he said. "Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture of you is of when you were younger. Here's a picture of me when I'm older. How'd you pull that off? Let me see that camera."

"I think pickles are cucumbers that sold out. They sold their soul to the devil and the devil is....Dill."

"Alocholism, is a disease, but it's the only disease that you can get yelled at for having. Dammit Otto, your an alcoholic. Dammit Otto, you have Lupis. One of those two doesn't sound right."

"I was walking by a drycleaner at 3a.m. and there was a sign that said Sorry, we're closed. You don't have to be sorry. It's 3a.m. and your a drycleaner. It would be ridiculous for me to expect you to be open. I'm not gonna come by at 10 and say, hey I was here at 3a.m and you guys were closed. Someone owes me an apology."

"I get the Reece's candy bar, If you read it, there's an apostrophe. The candy bar is his. I didn't know that. Next time your eating a Reece's and some guy named Reece comes up to you and says let me have that. You better give it to him. I'm sorry Reece, I didn't think I would ever run into you."

"I'vwe been working the colleges and I always buy the shirts from the college, because they're quality shirts. But people always get the wrong idea. I'm walking around wearing a Washington U shirt and someone says "Hey Washington U, Did you go there?" Yeah! It was a Wednesday."

"Y'know I order a club sandwhich all the time. And I'm not even a member. I don't know how I get away with it. I like my sanwhiches witth three peices of bread. So do I. Lets form a club. Okay, but we're gonna need more stickulation. Yes we do. Instead of cutting it once, lets cut it again. Yeah, four triangles. And we shall dump chips in the middle. Let me ask you something, how do you feel about frilly toothpicks? I'm for them."

"I opened a yogurt and underneath the lid it said "please try again" they were having a contest that Iwas unaware of. I thought maybe I had opened the yogurt wrong.Or maybe Yoplait was trying to inspire me. Come on Mitch, don't give up! An inspirational message from your friends at Yoplait, fruit on the bottom, hope on top."

"I brought a donut and the guy gave me a recieipt for the donut. I don't need a receipt for the donut, I give you the money, you give me the donut, end of transaction. We do not need to bring ink and paper into this. I can not imagine the senerio where I would have to prove that I broughrt a donut. Some skeptical friend. Don't even act like I didn't get that donut. I got the documentation right here."

"When you go a resturant on the weekends and it's busy so they start a waiting list. They say Dufrane, party of two, table ready for Dufrane, party of two , and if no one answers the'll say the name again, Dufrane, party of two. Bu then if no one answers, they'll move on to the next name. Bush party of three. Yeah, but what happened to the Dufranes, No one seems to care, who can eat at a time like this? People are missing. You people are selfish. The Dufranes are in someone's trunk right now ,with duct tape over their mouths and they're hungry.That'sa double whammy! We need help! Bush search aparty of three. You can eat once you find the Dufranes."

[Tim Whitehead]

That's funny stuff. Reminds me of Steven Wright.

[Kyle Berggren]

Chris, you've got the right guy. I've seen himi a few times live, he was great. I hope it's a bad joke, if so, he'll be at Emory on 4/6.

Anyone that hasn't listened to him, I'd recommend the strategic grill locations cd over the comedy central disk, I have both, they're similar, but I have to go with strategic grill locations.

"I like cinnamon rolls, but I don't always have time to make a pan. That's why I wish they would sell cinnamon roll incense. After all, I'd rather light a stick and have my roommate wake up with false hopes." ~ Mitch Hedberg

They actually sell cinnamon roll incense on his website now.

[ZagGrad]

Yep, that's the guy. Man, funny stuff.

[KerrLax]

No, he is dead. MTV.com reported it, and that's about as credible a source that will 1) know who he is and 2) care. This is from the article on MTV.com:

Hedberg joked often about drug abuse, but in a recent interview, he said he'd given up smoking marijuana several years ago. "For 10 years, it was amazing, but then I had to give it up because it didn't feel as good," he said. "The audience thinks I'm stoned all the time and I have to write my material that way ... so sometimes, when they come up to me after a show and ask me to join them, I just tell them I'm an undercover cop."

So, I don't think it had anything to do with drugs. They said he died of a heart attack. Such a shame. He was coming to Charlotte at the end of April, I was going to that show.

Whats up with everyone dying? Cochran and Hedberg, and then they read the Pope his last rights today. Oh yeah, that Schiavo lady too. (sorry, mean joke). But yeah, lots of people have been dying in the past few months.

[BB]

I have an oscillating fan at my house,the fan goes back and forth. It looks like the fan is saying no, so I like to ask it questions a fan would say no to. Do you keep my hair in place? Do you keep my documents in order? Do you have 3 settings? LIAR! My fan f'n lied to me. Now I will pull the pin up. Now you ain't sayin @#$%."

[LAXDawg14]

i saw him here at uga like 3 weeks ago........ just doesnt seem real

[TheBrad]

Wow, and i thought me and my friends were the only ones who heard of him.

So sad man, i wish i could have gotten to see him live.

Oh, another comedian thats almost as funny is Brian Regan, ever heard of him?