Real Football Heroes
Posted: Fri Jul 29, 2005 4:07 pm
Think of those Bud Light Real American Heroes and someone did a football version:
Nolz97 Presents: Real Football Heroes.
(Real football heee-roooes.)
Today we salute you, Mr. Walk on Punt Team Coverage Guy.
(Mr. Walk on Punt Team Coverage Guy!)
Like a missle, you shoot down the field without regard for health or personal dignity - because it's the only time you can.
(Runnin' down the field now!)
You attempt to light up anything wearing the other team's jersey - block in the back be damned.
(Blind sided!)
You're only on the field for 42 seconds a game, but when you are, you're the smallest guy out there - and usually way out of position.
(Where am I goin'?!?)
So crack open a fresh Powerade, Mr. Heisman - and get ready for your name to be announced throughout the staduim.... after a 15 yard penalty.
(Mr. Walk On Punt Team Coverage Guy!)
---------
Nolz97 Presents: Real Football Heroes.
(Real football heroes.)
Today we salute you, Mr. TV Timeout Signaler.
(Mr. TV Timeout Signaler!)
Some people carry the Nuclear Football, others are police officers. You stand on a field and keep football games from re-starting for what seems like an eternity.
(Ultimate power!)
Some people love attention, some hate it. You stand showing no emotion as 80,000 fans wait for you to get your fat @ss off the field so their game can re-start.
(Just 15 more seconds!)
The fact that the entire stadium is staring at you wishing you would die doesn't phase you. The viewers at home need their car commercials.
(Insaaaaane prices!)
So crack open a cold Powerade, Mr. TV Timeout Signaler. You hold up play, so TV stations can get paid.
(Mr. TV Timeout Signaler!)
Nolz97 Presents: Real Football Heroes.
(Real football heee-roooes.)
Today we salute you, Mr. Walk on Punt Team Coverage Guy.
(Mr. Walk on Punt Team Coverage Guy!)
Like a missle, you shoot down the field without regard for health or personal dignity - because it's the only time you can.
(Runnin' down the field now!)
You attempt to light up anything wearing the other team's jersey - block in the back be damned.
(Blind sided!)
You're only on the field for 42 seconds a game, but when you are, you're the smallest guy out there - and usually way out of position.
(Where am I goin'?!?)
So crack open a fresh Powerade, Mr. Heisman - and get ready for your name to be announced throughout the staduim.... after a 15 yard penalty.
(Mr. Walk On Punt Team Coverage Guy!)
---------
Nolz97 Presents: Real Football Heroes.
(Real football heroes.)
Today we salute you, Mr. TV Timeout Signaler.
(Mr. TV Timeout Signaler!)
Some people carry the Nuclear Football, others are police officers. You stand on a field and keep football games from re-starting for what seems like an eternity.
(Ultimate power!)
Some people love attention, some hate it. You stand showing no emotion as 80,000 fans wait for you to get your fat @ss off the field so their game can re-start.
(Just 15 more seconds!)
The fact that the entire stadium is staring at you wishing you would die doesn't phase you. The viewers at home need their car commercials.
(Insaaaaane prices!)
So crack open a cold Powerade, Mr. TV Timeout Signaler. You hold up play, so TV stations can get paid.
(Mr. TV Timeout Signaler!)